What a bold title today!
The truth is, I can't change your world. My world is full of it's own challenges, it's ups and downs. I am engaged, present to my own process of acceptance or taking action or letting go, whatever is required in the moment.
I'm there with you, in this fullness of life. Yet what your experience is, is of your own making. I can stand beside you yet you are the only one present for your own journey, just as I am for mine.
You are the the process itself and only by your own consciousness can the world change. Something is not going to happen to enlighten you. It happens in you because you pay attention, because you care, because you understand that no one else can do this for you in the way and depth you can do it for yourself.
We have all wished otherwise. Please someone take care of us. Our parents, friends, relatives, state, government all turn out to be inadequate, it's true. It's a setup really. Unfair even.
In the end it's you. We grow up and begin to look within. We see how our beliefs and misunderstandings color what we see and feel. We struggle with the alluring demons in our heads that tell us falsehoods and we gather the courage to say no, not now and not ever. We come to terms with our imperfections so we are not just walled off from the truth of our humanness. We accept our dominion over our own lives, weeding out the falsehoods and opening to a deeper sense of our place in the world. We let go and begin to see a new truth, one that includes both our humanity and our innate spirituality.
I love myself so I can now love you. I used to think if I could just love and accept you then I would be alright, that my undisclosed pain would absolve. It didn't work that way for me (let me know if it did for you). My self hatred was so deep and pervasive. I was the one that left the garden of Eden, that left paradise and needed so desperately to go home. It was my fault, there was something wrong with me, driven out of the kingdom for unknown but suspected iniquities. The original sin deal. Sorry it's not true. That lie keeps you small so others can control you. That lie allows you to give your power to others. Either way it's not true. You are meant to have your own life, your own dominion over your world.
We don't know if we even want that. It means taking responsibility for whatever happens within us when it's so easy to blame anything and everything on the outside. Our excuses abound: I'm too busy, worried, broke, inadequate, whatever.
We have been trained to look outside ourselves and for someone else to fix things. Magical thinking. We think that we are powerless to change our world because we have been taught that it's outside ourselves. Nothing could be further from the truth. Let's choose to wake up now. "Be the Change". Who you are is your responsibility and your resonance sends a message to everything around you about what you think and feel is true about life. Then that's what you experience. No one else can free you from the lies. Breathe it in and then let it go.
It's all in you.
Inhale and breathe in all the gifts and possibilities of this moment. This is where it starts. Now. Now is here, feel it, embrace it. This is what we have. The fullness begins here, the acceptance starts here, the recognition begins here. Let the lies go and allow yourself to be present. Your life begins anew right now. This is your life, don't be afraid that there's nothing here for you. Allow it to unfold in it's depths and simplicity. Trust life and trust yourself, it's all in you.
Blessings,
Laurel
Showing posts with label Healing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Healing. Show all posts
Friday, September 26, 2008
Monday, September 1, 2008
Forgiveness
The trees tell me they are in a constant state of total acceptance of all that is. From this place of awareness, forgiveness is unneccessary. Oh to be so free from judgement!
Life has it’s conditions, this is always the case. We have basic needs of survival, for food, shelter and protecting our children until they’re grown. We can offer a homeless person five dollars or even twenty, but we might not invite them home. Life is conditional. A mouse may choose to go on living, would rather not be a meal for someone else if he can help it, yet someday he might be that meal. We all make choices to continue living, just as what ate the mouse did. Our life is an amazing gift and we own the rights to care for it.
Acceptance takes us to another level of care. We can accept a homeless person’s right to be and choices she makes. We can offer compassion for those choices, out of respect, not guilt. We would not think of uprooting a tree growing on a windsweept cliff, judging it a poor choice of this tree. We might even admire it’s tenacity to handle such adversity. There is a randomness in nature that fits a perfect bell curve, we too are part of that.
Acceptance is a big goal. Most of the time we look at it as something we offer the external world, yet it truly begins in how we treat ourselves. Our humaness is not always easy to be with. An ideal is held in our minds eye and we strive to meet it. We fail, beat ourselves up and sometimes give up, locking into a pattern of stubborness that protects us but does not serve us. We hold up our imperfections to others and suggest that we can’t do anything about them. We wallow in being stuck, judge ourselves incapable, and deny responsiblity. We are more than this.
Today consider looking at some aspect of yourself that you don’t like. Maybe not the biggest, toughest thing. Pick something small and maybe concrete, a little habit of picking at your cuticles, or judging a particular type of person, anything really. Then hold that part of yourself as human, not perfect but okay. Hold yourself in compassion for this little fault, for this small imperfect part of you that is oh so human. Open your heart to forgiving yourself for this and allow your love to embrace it as you would a small immature child. This is a part of you, allow it. It’s okay to be an imperfect human. Allow your heart to nourish this part also, not just the parts you like.
This is how we begin to open to a new level of awareness, in just small steps as this. This is what is held in our ’shadow’ side; the parts of ourself we don’t want to see and face. You have probably tried the ‘all is love and light’ path and sensed that it’s not taking you where you want to go. Light does not exist without the darkness. They balance each other and teach humanity how to achieve balance also. Think of the darkness as moving the light forward. When we feel or see that disliked part of ourselves, we finally have the opportunity to take action.
We can choose to ignore it thus causing it to be projected outside of ourselves (hence our troubled relationships) or we can begin to befriend what we don’t like. In quantum physics the observer changes the observed. We can begin to heal ourselves by sitting in acceptance of what’s not so nice. This is challenging of course, yet now is a good time to start. In wanting our world to be filled with peace and light, we can create it by taking in vs projecting out what we don’t like. In loving what is, we absorb and transform our personal darkness into light and sadness into joy.
We have perfected the pushing away of what is not good and it hasn’t worked. Now we can begin to be present for ourselves in a new way that heals us. This builds trust and awareness, and awareness opens new dimensions of reality, allowing new depth and meaning to nourish our hearts.
Blessings,
Laurel
Life has it’s conditions, this is always the case. We have basic needs of survival, for food, shelter and protecting our children until they’re grown. We can offer a homeless person five dollars or even twenty, but we might not invite them home. Life is conditional. A mouse may choose to go on living, would rather not be a meal for someone else if he can help it, yet someday he might be that meal. We all make choices to continue living, just as what ate the mouse did. Our life is an amazing gift and we own the rights to care for it.
Acceptance takes us to another level of care. We can accept a homeless person’s right to be and choices she makes. We can offer compassion for those choices, out of respect, not guilt. We would not think of uprooting a tree growing on a windsweept cliff, judging it a poor choice of this tree. We might even admire it’s tenacity to handle such adversity. There is a randomness in nature that fits a perfect bell curve, we too are part of that.
Acceptance is a big goal. Most of the time we look at it as something we offer the external world, yet it truly begins in how we treat ourselves. Our humaness is not always easy to be with. An ideal is held in our minds eye and we strive to meet it. We fail, beat ourselves up and sometimes give up, locking into a pattern of stubborness that protects us but does not serve us. We hold up our imperfections to others and suggest that we can’t do anything about them. We wallow in being stuck, judge ourselves incapable, and deny responsiblity. We are more than this.
Today consider looking at some aspect of yourself that you don’t like. Maybe not the biggest, toughest thing. Pick something small and maybe concrete, a little habit of picking at your cuticles, or judging a particular type of person, anything really. Then hold that part of yourself as human, not perfect but okay. Hold yourself in compassion for this little fault, for this small imperfect part of you that is oh so human. Open your heart to forgiving yourself for this and allow your love to embrace it as you would a small immature child. This is a part of you, allow it. It’s okay to be an imperfect human. Allow your heart to nourish this part also, not just the parts you like.
This is how we begin to open to a new level of awareness, in just small steps as this. This is what is held in our ’shadow’ side; the parts of ourself we don’t want to see and face. You have probably tried the ‘all is love and light’ path and sensed that it’s not taking you where you want to go. Light does not exist without the darkness. They balance each other and teach humanity how to achieve balance also. Think of the darkness as moving the light forward. When we feel or see that disliked part of ourselves, we finally have the opportunity to take action.
We can choose to ignore it thus causing it to be projected outside of ourselves (hence our troubled relationships) or we can begin to befriend what we don’t like. In quantum physics the observer changes the observed. We can begin to heal ourselves by sitting in acceptance of what’s not so nice. This is challenging of course, yet now is a good time to start. In wanting our world to be filled with peace and light, we can create it by taking in vs projecting out what we don’t like. In loving what is, we absorb and transform our personal darkness into light and sadness into joy.
We have perfected the pushing away of what is not good and it hasn’t worked. Now we can begin to be present for ourselves in a new way that heals us. This builds trust and awareness, and awareness opens new dimensions of reality, allowing new depth and meaning to nourish our hearts.
Blessings,
Laurel
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Healing the Past, Monday, August 18th, 2008 Being Present for Today
I’m allergic to cats, have been for years. The sneezing and runny nose are bearable but tearing, itchy eyes can really overwhelm me. So I’ve been here for two days with two lovely cats, and I’m going back and forth between the 2 parts of the house, getting things I need to be comfortable, feeding the animals, etc. I’m taking a homeopathic animal dander remedy and putting in eye drops but whoa, it flares up and I can’t stop tearing and it’s really uncomfortable. Saturday I go visit a friend who I didn’t know also had a cat and even though I spend most of the time outside, I’m pretty miserable. My other eye starts to react also. Sunday, I’m constantly putting drops in, remembering the last time when I ended up at the eye doctors in a toxic allergic state. I attend a healing group I belong to and plan to stop by my house after and pick up my air cleaner for the apartment here. I’m worried I won’t be able to stay here and I love it here.
Please know with every healer and modality I’ve done, I’ve brought up this allergy for treatment. Usually I feel better but it has never cleared completely. So in our group I put it on the list, open but not convinced it’ll help much. In our group everyone puts their stuff on a list and we all work the list. (We’re all in this together!) So I’m working on my allergy and receive this whole picture of a conversation on the phone a long time ago with my Mom where all she’s talking about are her cats. Here I see myself saddened one more time with my Mom’s self absorption and my neediness. It’s painful and the message is to forgive my Mom and embrace who I was back then. I do not allow my mind to recreate a story or attempt to ‘process’ this information. I stay with the sadness, accept what I feel and stay with what’s in my heart. In order to move forward, I need to embrace my past self with full acceptance and absolve my Mom of my self care now.
My eye starts to quiet immediately after the healing. I open up the whole house to the cool evening air as I have done each night here. The tearing lessens and I take particular care to avoid the main house and to trust my body to resolve this. Of course I take the remedy and the drops, but something feels very different. Today my right eye is fine and my left eye has a mild irritation, the tearing is minimal.
I am reminded once more that this life is deeper than what we think. Maybe I have never really been allergic to cats at all, just allergic to a hurtful experience in my past, my body graciously somaticizing it into a bearable problem. Today I have felt okay when I was in the ‘catful’ part of the house, as I am right now. My eye feels like it is healing and my soul feels it is opening to a new level of acceptance of myself.
I know my expansion comes out of the connection to my past. Some people feel that each of us cannot more forward without all of us moving forward together. I don’t know if this is true; I do know that I’m responsible for me and I can help myself. My job is to heal my life by total radical acceptance of all I’ve ever been. This is the biggest and most blessed challenge I’ve ever taken on, especially since the only way, after all these years of thinking through it all, is to feel, feel and keep feeling until I’m done. The mind can never heal a broken heart and the heart is the only place where truth and reality appear.
Long ago, one of my teachers said the first thing we feel when we begin to open the heart is sadness. Most people back away right then, moving up into their heads to explain it all away. But the illusionary cure is not real. The pain goes underground and often comes out in weird ways. I’m sure we’ve all experienced that; the surprise attack of an emotion out of the blue that seems overdone for whatever situation we’re facing.
Being with myself totally, with whatever I’m honestly experiencing, is not always easy. It doesn’t necessarily look spiritual. Yet it works and I’m a practical person, I want to do what works. Loving my Mom and loving myself doesn’t always feel like the shortest path to a resolution, or the easiest. I don’t know yet whether I am free of my cat allergy but I am loving all aspects of my life right now.
The feeling I had most of today was one of immersion. Immersion into the depths of life, opening to the unseen world that underlies everything, the sacred world that holds the fabric and the magic that goes beyond what we usually see and think. Loving all of who I have been and all of who I am right now heals me. Then life unfolds her aliveness out my back door and the earth sings it’s glory.
Blessings,
Laurel
Please know with every healer and modality I’ve done, I’ve brought up this allergy for treatment. Usually I feel better but it has never cleared completely. So in our group I put it on the list, open but not convinced it’ll help much. In our group everyone puts their stuff on a list and we all work the list. (We’re all in this together!) So I’m working on my allergy and receive this whole picture of a conversation on the phone a long time ago with my Mom where all she’s talking about are her cats. Here I see myself saddened one more time with my Mom’s self absorption and my neediness. It’s painful and the message is to forgive my Mom and embrace who I was back then. I do not allow my mind to recreate a story or attempt to ‘process’ this information. I stay with the sadness, accept what I feel and stay with what’s in my heart. In order to move forward, I need to embrace my past self with full acceptance and absolve my Mom of my self care now.
My eye starts to quiet immediately after the healing. I open up the whole house to the cool evening air as I have done each night here. The tearing lessens and I take particular care to avoid the main house and to trust my body to resolve this. Of course I take the remedy and the drops, but something feels very different. Today my right eye is fine and my left eye has a mild irritation, the tearing is minimal.
I am reminded once more that this life is deeper than what we think. Maybe I have never really been allergic to cats at all, just allergic to a hurtful experience in my past, my body graciously somaticizing it into a bearable problem. Today I have felt okay when I was in the ‘catful’ part of the house, as I am right now. My eye feels like it is healing and my soul feels it is opening to a new level of acceptance of myself.
I know my expansion comes out of the connection to my past. Some people feel that each of us cannot more forward without all of us moving forward together. I don’t know if this is true; I do know that I’m responsible for me and I can help myself. My job is to heal my life by total radical acceptance of all I’ve ever been. This is the biggest and most blessed challenge I’ve ever taken on, especially since the only way, after all these years of thinking through it all, is to feel, feel and keep feeling until I’m done. The mind can never heal a broken heart and the heart is the only place where truth and reality appear.
Long ago, one of my teachers said the first thing we feel when we begin to open the heart is sadness. Most people back away right then, moving up into their heads to explain it all away. But the illusionary cure is not real. The pain goes underground and often comes out in weird ways. I’m sure we’ve all experienced that; the surprise attack of an emotion out of the blue that seems overdone for whatever situation we’re facing.
Being with myself totally, with whatever I’m honestly experiencing, is not always easy. It doesn’t necessarily look spiritual. Yet it works and I’m a practical person, I want to do what works. Loving my Mom and loving myself doesn’t always feel like the shortest path to a resolution, or the easiest. I don’t know yet whether I am free of my cat allergy but I am loving all aspects of my life right now.
The feeling I had most of today was one of immersion. Immersion into the depths of life, opening to the unseen world that underlies everything, the sacred world that holds the fabric and the magic that goes beyond what we usually see and think. Loving all of who I have been and all of who I am right now heals me. Then life unfolds her aliveness out my back door and the earth sings it’s glory.
Blessings,
Laurel
A Noisy Quiet- Friday, August 15, 2008
I’m housesitting for the next few weeks way out in the country and down a long dirt road. The planes still zoom overhead but it’s minor compared to the deep stillness in the land. This is how I want to live; with stillness within my aliveness. It seems a contradiction yet it is so obvious out here. There’s a constant racket from the birds, hens, frogs and ducks, yet the tree life is immense and deep roots run under it all. The racket is really song and story and somehow adds vs. subtracts from my awareness of my center. They call me into my heartspace. Feel, feel says the world. Be attracted to who you really are. Sit in your animal being, let your mind take a back seat, give up control by the mind to the heart.
Yes, I have some ‘work’ to do. What value is work when it comes from a space ruled by the mind? How does it feel if my hearts not in it? In my heart lie realms of creativity, depth and shadow, austuteness all sure to be missed by a mind that is looking for safety and security. In my heart, I am allowed to be with all I’ve ever been and all I am now, bringing all these aspects of myself into a new resolution of healing. There is space and depth of being that the flatness and linearity of the mind can’t embrace. Like the crooks and curves of the tree’s roots and branches, it’s time to open to a new awareness of being. By living all of who we are and opening to the wholeness and creativity, we can heal our lives and our world.
Take a breath, feels how it nourishes your heart. You are divine, stop giving control of this precious life to the mind. It’s yours, take it back to your heart. Here your life begins anew each day, here true living has magic and mystery and meaning.
Blessings,
Laurel
Yes, I have some ‘work’ to do. What value is work when it comes from a space ruled by the mind? How does it feel if my hearts not in it? In my heart lie realms of creativity, depth and shadow, austuteness all sure to be missed by a mind that is looking for safety and security. In my heart, I am allowed to be with all I’ve ever been and all I am now, bringing all these aspects of myself into a new resolution of healing. There is space and depth of being that the flatness and linearity of the mind can’t embrace. Like the crooks and curves of the tree’s roots and branches, it’s time to open to a new awareness of being. By living all of who we are and opening to the wholeness and creativity, we can heal our lives and our world.
Take a breath, feels how it nourishes your heart. You are divine, stop giving control of this precious life to the mind. It’s yours, take it back to your heart. Here your life begins anew each day, here true living has magic and mystery and meaning.
Blessings,
Laurel
Tools of the Trade-Saturday, July 19, 2008
So often when people show up for the free class overview they want to know what tools are going to be taught. There are quite a few tools- meditations, healing practices, working with sacred geometry for creating- taught in the whole series but the ground needs to be laid down before the tide comes in. They don’t work well without some basic principles being embraced.
Tools are useless for the unfound because life is so full of strong winds, it’s easy to lose ourselves. First we have to find ourselves. Until someone is ready to turn within, assuage their thoughts and listen to their bodies and hearts they can’t begin to feed themselves. If they don’t know how to feed themselves every day, throwing a few practices at them is like throwing sand at the wind.
This is a new skill for most of us and I still practice it every day. If I forget to orient myself first thing in the morning, I can find myself at midday feeling lost and uncentered. If I put my heart and breath first, the day can be absolutely magical or at least simple, a quality of being often grossly undervalued. When one doesn’t have this basic understanding it’s hard to teach them. They are not present so there is no foundation on which to lay down a path.
First I teach what the trees taught me; who we are and how to heal ourselves, how to feed ourselves so we are self generating, self filling. This is no small thing and to me, leaves a lot of spirtual practices in the dust. Most of us need the basics, every day, on how to live. Well at least I did and do! All the spirtual understandings then can land, then can be implemented, then can fulfill their promises.
I read recently that most spiritual paths are either about renunciation, transcendence or acceptance. This path is not about renunciation, unless you’re referring to the control of the little mind. It’s not about transcendence unless you’re referring to what’s not real. It is all about acceptance of who you really are and creating your life from your heart and compassion.
I am so honored to be sharing what the trees have taught me and most of all to be living in this grace, this presence of knowing who I am, of being the ‘I AM’.
Please consider joining me in September for the basics on how to live, how to love ourselves and how to bring peace into your life.
Blessings,
Laurel
Tools are useless for the unfound because life is so full of strong winds, it’s easy to lose ourselves. First we have to find ourselves. Until someone is ready to turn within, assuage their thoughts and listen to their bodies and hearts they can’t begin to feed themselves. If they don’t know how to feed themselves every day, throwing a few practices at them is like throwing sand at the wind.
This is a new skill for most of us and I still practice it every day. If I forget to orient myself first thing in the morning, I can find myself at midday feeling lost and uncentered. If I put my heart and breath first, the day can be absolutely magical or at least simple, a quality of being often grossly undervalued. When one doesn’t have this basic understanding it’s hard to teach them. They are not present so there is no foundation on which to lay down a path.
First I teach what the trees taught me; who we are and how to heal ourselves, how to feed ourselves so we are self generating, self filling. This is no small thing and to me, leaves a lot of spirtual practices in the dust. Most of us need the basics, every day, on how to live. Well at least I did and do! All the spirtual understandings then can land, then can be implemented, then can fulfill their promises.
I read recently that most spiritual paths are either about renunciation, transcendence or acceptance. This path is not about renunciation, unless you’re referring to the control of the little mind. It’s not about transcendence unless you’re referring to what’s not real. It is all about acceptance of who you really are and creating your life from your heart and compassion.
I am so honored to be sharing what the trees have taught me and most of all to be living in this grace, this presence of knowing who I am, of being the ‘I AM’.
Please consider joining me in September for the basics on how to live, how to love ourselves and how to bring peace into your life.
Blessings,
Laurel
Great Quote- Sunday, July 13, 2008
Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex… It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.
-- Albert Einstein
-- Albert Einstein
Time for the Poetry of Life- Friday, July 11, 2008
Amidst the intensity of the last month there is an underlying knowing that this will pass and what will come forward will not be more chaos and separation but more truth. What is truth? I’m not sure but it feels right deep in my body and soul…I know it when I find it. There is something beyond the external illusion of what seems soooo important which can feel like matter conjured up for drama and posturing.
I know my truth lies deeper and in more stillness and that’s where I often go, especially when people and situations throw up big dramas and long treatises on “what’s important to understand”, that is full of shadow and emptiness. My heart is made up, it doesn’t want to act out others dramas, be in someone else’s truth, go along on someone else’s ride unless it’s headed in the right direction. When my own dramas show up they are big enough for me and they are my responsibility. That’s my job now, to heal what comes for me. I don’t/can’t go looking for others to fix anymore, that’s just the distractions talking, pulling me away from the true work. I used to think I would be okay if I healed/helped others. The answers for others are quick, easy and all in my head. So codependent, so encouraged by the dogmas of churches and consensus.
My own answers are deep, wrenching at times, real and nourishing if I take that ride to it’s finish, telling my truth and asking myself to step up to only what’s real in life, to the trust and love that’s behind it all. This is self-full love. This is the bottom line of what works. Yes, let’s be as kind as possible to our mirrors and our companions. They are doing their jobs too.
Every day in my work I am confronted with disconnection, separation and disassociation in others bodies and minds. I love my work, I am truly grateful that I can be present to shine a light on what hurts and encourage what heals to come forth. I see how hard it is for us to love ourselves, how difficult to see who we really are and to accept fully our bodies and our lives. My clients have taught me so much about myself and about healing. Mostly, how layered, tender and complex we are and how powerfully gentleness and presence works. This world takes us on the ride of a lifetime literally, and to find our ground, our light and true direction is the miracle, but hopefully not the exception.
The universe is conspiring to help us see the truth, to guide us back to ourselves, to throw up so much chaos in our faces, we have to surrender to the truth inside ourselves, to take refuge from the storm of the unreal to the holy temple within, to the heart. The mind will never stop wanting unending answers to it’s unending questions. The story has to stop somewhere so reality can have a chance to grow and bloom.
If it doesn’t feel real, it may not be or at least not for you. Please trust yourself. Let’s go back to something simpler. Forget the story, feel what is real, rest in your breath and body. Walk in nature. You may not know all the ‘answers’ but you will rarely come out confused.
Biggest blessings,
Laurel and the Trees
Comments:
I went to Rockport, MA this weekend, and talked to the sea for the first time. On the pure shores, rocky and stark, the land is just teeming with life. The sea, she has her own way, a mother that knows what’s best for you whether you like it or not. At her edge, I filled myself with the energy of her winds and waves, but she just as readily, she took all that away, leaving me a clean, empty vessel. It was a humbling experience, for one who spends so much time in their divinity. russen
I know my truth lies deeper and in more stillness and that’s where I often go, especially when people and situations throw up big dramas and long treatises on “what’s important to understand”, that is full of shadow and emptiness. My heart is made up, it doesn’t want to act out others dramas, be in someone else’s truth, go along on someone else’s ride unless it’s headed in the right direction. When my own dramas show up they are big enough for me and they are my responsibility. That’s my job now, to heal what comes for me. I don’t/can’t go looking for others to fix anymore, that’s just the distractions talking, pulling me away from the true work. I used to think I would be okay if I healed/helped others. The answers for others are quick, easy and all in my head. So codependent, so encouraged by the dogmas of churches and consensus.
My own answers are deep, wrenching at times, real and nourishing if I take that ride to it’s finish, telling my truth and asking myself to step up to only what’s real in life, to the trust and love that’s behind it all. This is self-full love. This is the bottom line of what works. Yes, let’s be as kind as possible to our mirrors and our companions. They are doing their jobs too.
Every day in my work I am confronted with disconnection, separation and disassociation in others bodies and minds. I love my work, I am truly grateful that I can be present to shine a light on what hurts and encourage what heals to come forth. I see how hard it is for us to love ourselves, how difficult to see who we really are and to accept fully our bodies and our lives. My clients have taught me so much about myself and about healing. Mostly, how layered, tender and complex we are and how powerfully gentleness and presence works. This world takes us on the ride of a lifetime literally, and to find our ground, our light and true direction is the miracle, but hopefully not the exception.
The universe is conspiring to help us see the truth, to guide us back to ourselves, to throw up so much chaos in our faces, we have to surrender to the truth inside ourselves, to take refuge from the storm of the unreal to the holy temple within, to the heart. The mind will never stop wanting unending answers to it’s unending questions. The story has to stop somewhere so reality can have a chance to grow and bloom.
If it doesn’t feel real, it may not be or at least not for you. Please trust yourself. Let’s go back to something simpler. Forget the story, feel what is real, rest in your breath and body. Walk in nature. You may not know all the ‘answers’ but you will rarely come out confused.
Biggest blessings,
Laurel and the Trees
Comments:
I went to Rockport, MA this weekend, and talked to the sea for the first time. On the pure shores, rocky and stark, the land is just teeming with life. The sea, she has her own way, a mother that knows what’s best for you whether you like it or not. At her edge, I filled myself with the energy of her winds and waves, but she just as readily, she took all that away, leaving me a clean, empty vessel. It was a humbling experience, for one who spends so much time in their divinity. russen
Direct from The Council of Trees- Friday, June 20, 2008
Looking at the evolutionary history on our Gaia, we see that many species of plants and animals have come and then gone extinct. You may be glad there are no dinosaurs nowadays yet reasonably concerned with the rumors that the bees are beginning to leave.
Please understand that every plant and animal here carries a vibrational frequency that benefits the whole. We said ‘Benefits the Whole’. Let’s leave the subject of humans until later, for as you can imagine, this is questionable.
So each polar bear, each honey bee, every plant and tree carries a frequency that allows the whole planet to stay in balance. As the planet evolved, some animals and plants left, some evolved into more complex species and some stayed the same. There is no coincidence here and there have been no mistakes. All the animals and the plants on the Earth hold the frequency of renewal and rejuvenation for each other. There is an unseen cooperative system here that happens on all levels of being: physical and energetic.
Humans have come to think of themselves as being beyond their bodies and separate from nature and their Mother. Nothing is further from the truth. Even with all the knowledge of ecology, humans tend to ‘think’ themselves separate, literally! Thinking has been very beneficial for humans for planning and executing complex tasks and creations, yet it has become the dominant way of being. Humans stay in their heads and forget their bodies and senses, distancing themselves from the very help they desperately need for health on all levels.
When birds sing creation awake in the morning, they are literally doing just that! When animals buzz, caw, huff, mew and bark they are singing their species and a frequency and partnership that all participate in. Even animals that don’t make noises that humans hear are in constant communication through the wavelength they resonate on.
Humans have stopped listening and few are resonating in partnership to benefit the whole. It’s not only that we don’t hear nature around us, it’s that we don’t hear OURSELVES. We are at war with ourselves and therefore with the whole planet. We can try to ’save’ the planet but the planet will die without us! We are inheriting the dominion of the earth now and we are to be responsible for carrying the frequency of health and cooperation for the whole planet. Let me repeat that:
We are inheriting the dominion of the earth now and we are to be responsible for carrying the frequency of health and cooperation for the whole planet.
We tend to see nature as self-regenerating and self-sufficient and come up with simple (or complex) solutions to save the planet. Yet we are the ones who are lost and we are the ones that need saving!! Denying our bodies, our feelings and our senses; the frequency we put out to the rest of the planet doesn’t support life. Sending out a meditative wave once a month or even every morning doesn’t make up for living in your mental body all day long. Thinking needs to begin to take a back seat to feeling (which can be accessed through breathing) and being present to nature’s resonance.
We know this is not easy. It is an unused skill and can seem unnecessary even. Yet the only real way to save the planet is to take this all very, very personally. Fight the war within yourself, otherwise it is projected outside of you. Be present with yourself so that nature can speak to you, commune with you and heal you. Yes, there will be painful and sad times. Take responsibility for healing yourself by being present to what is yours. Learn to love yourself and to have compassion for yourself. This simple act will do more for the total health of the planet than you can ever imagine!
Wash the thousands of lifetimes of each human on this sacred planet with forgiveness and compassion. Begin with your own. This is what will ’save’ our Mother, this is what will save us.
Blessings,
The Council
Comments:
What exactly does this mean? We are inheriting the dominion of the earth? ruling power, authority, control? This is a huge responsibility, and true. We all need to hear this and respond with gratitude, strength and the ability to persevere with great determination in all our thoughts and actions. We do need to come from our hearts in all our daily tasks and choices to give this earth a beautiful and healthy future now. Thank you for the reminder, let us wake up and shape up!!
Asia
Hi Asia,
I felt overwhelmed after this message came through. I knew there was a part of me that wanted to see the Earth as just doing fine without me so I could think I wasn’t responsible. But that’s the point of this message..it’s important to be part of the Earth, to heal ourselves and allow that new level of connection to guide us in our ecological efforts. We can’t control the Earth any more than we can control each other. We can foster health and strength through understanding and respect. We are part of the ecology of the Earth and our planet will represent our health and wisdom or our dis-ease. We choose with every conscious breath we take. Laurel
Please understand that every plant and animal here carries a vibrational frequency that benefits the whole. We said ‘Benefits the Whole’. Let’s leave the subject of humans until later, for as you can imagine, this is questionable.
So each polar bear, each honey bee, every plant and tree carries a frequency that allows the whole planet to stay in balance. As the planet evolved, some animals and plants left, some evolved into more complex species and some stayed the same. There is no coincidence here and there have been no mistakes. All the animals and the plants on the Earth hold the frequency of renewal and rejuvenation for each other. There is an unseen cooperative system here that happens on all levels of being: physical and energetic.
Humans have come to think of themselves as being beyond their bodies and separate from nature and their Mother. Nothing is further from the truth. Even with all the knowledge of ecology, humans tend to ‘think’ themselves separate, literally! Thinking has been very beneficial for humans for planning and executing complex tasks and creations, yet it has become the dominant way of being. Humans stay in their heads and forget their bodies and senses, distancing themselves from the very help they desperately need for health on all levels.
When birds sing creation awake in the morning, they are literally doing just that! When animals buzz, caw, huff, mew and bark they are singing their species and a frequency and partnership that all participate in. Even animals that don’t make noises that humans hear are in constant communication through the wavelength they resonate on.
Humans have stopped listening and few are resonating in partnership to benefit the whole. It’s not only that we don’t hear nature around us, it’s that we don’t hear OURSELVES. We are at war with ourselves and therefore with the whole planet. We can try to ’save’ the planet but the planet will die without us! We are inheriting the dominion of the earth now and we are to be responsible for carrying the frequency of health and cooperation for the whole planet. Let me repeat that:
We are inheriting the dominion of the earth now and we are to be responsible for carrying the frequency of health and cooperation for the whole planet.
We tend to see nature as self-regenerating and self-sufficient and come up with simple (or complex) solutions to save the planet. Yet we are the ones who are lost and we are the ones that need saving!! Denying our bodies, our feelings and our senses; the frequency we put out to the rest of the planet doesn’t support life. Sending out a meditative wave once a month or even every morning doesn’t make up for living in your mental body all day long. Thinking needs to begin to take a back seat to feeling (which can be accessed through breathing) and being present to nature’s resonance.
We know this is not easy. It is an unused skill and can seem unnecessary even. Yet the only real way to save the planet is to take this all very, very personally. Fight the war within yourself, otherwise it is projected outside of you. Be present with yourself so that nature can speak to you, commune with you and heal you. Yes, there will be painful and sad times. Take responsibility for healing yourself by being present to what is yours. Learn to love yourself and to have compassion for yourself. This simple act will do more for the total health of the planet than you can ever imagine!
Wash the thousands of lifetimes of each human on this sacred planet with forgiveness and compassion. Begin with your own. This is what will ’save’ our Mother, this is what will save us.
Blessings,
The Council
Comments:
What exactly does this mean? We are inheriting the dominion of the earth? ruling power, authority, control? This is a huge responsibility, and true. We all need to hear this and respond with gratitude, strength and the ability to persevere with great determination in all our thoughts and actions. We do need to come from our hearts in all our daily tasks and choices to give this earth a beautiful and healthy future now. Thank you for the reminder, let us wake up and shape up!!
Asia
Hi Asia,
I felt overwhelmed after this message came through. I knew there was a part of me that wanted to see the Earth as just doing fine without me so I could think I wasn’t responsible. But that’s the point of this message..it’s important to be part of the Earth, to heal ourselves and allow that new level of connection to guide us in our ecological efforts. We can’t control the Earth any more than we can control each other. We can foster health and strength through understanding and respect. We are part of the ecology of the Earth and our planet will represent our health and wisdom or our dis-ease. We choose with every conscious breath we take. Laurel
Being Whole- Monday, May 12, 2008
Today I allow myself to live inside me, to be my own witness of my thoughts, feelings and sensations. There is a whole universe in here if I am willing to sit with it. This life is big enough for one person. It is multidimensional, varied and full of so much potential I am just beginning to see. In paying attention (such a small cost!) I open to what is there, which is much more than I ever thought even existed.
In another lifetime(it feels like that) I didn’t know what to do with all I felt and all I thought and was often scoulded for what was true for me. Don’t think that! Don’t feel that! I didn’t understand what I thought and especially felt were my keys, were my salvation to a deeper experience of life. I no longer dismiss myself and bow to others truths.
The beauty of the world is best seen from deep inside me. This is the attention I used to desire from others that I now am able to give to myself. Now I can be with others wanting nothing from them, able to listen and witness without judgement, able to love my neighbor as myself. In owning my own self, my fears, misunderstandings and doubts, I see with my heart, with compassion. Gratitude reigns supreme as I bow to the wholeness within me. It is in every breath.
Today this is the invitation from The Council of Trees to me and to you. Breathe and feel, breathe and feel.
Blessings,
Laurel
In another lifetime(it feels like that) I didn’t know what to do with all I felt and all I thought and was often scoulded for what was true for me. Don’t think that! Don’t feel that! I didn’t understand what I thought and especially felt were my keys, were my salvation to a deeper experience of life. I no longer dismiss myself and bow to others truths.
The beauty of the world is best seen from deep inside me. This is the attention I used to desire from others that I now am able to give to myself. Now I can be with others wanting nothing from them, able to listen and witness without judgement, able to love my neighbor as myself. In owning my own self, my fears, misunderstandings and doubts, I see with my heart, with compassion. Gratitude reigns supreme as I bow to the wholeness within me. It is in every breath.
Today this is the invitation from The Council of Trees to me and to you. Breathe and feel, breathe and feel.
Blessings,
Laurel
Triggered- Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Oh so human I am, forever will be and that’s okay. Not easy but okay. A few days ago I found myself in a situation where I felt an agreement was not kept. Lots of anger and tears came amidst remembering to breathe. My reactions were strong even though one part of me seemed to be watching it all in disgust and saying ‘this is not very spiritual!’. But I have given up trying to be spiritual and am committed to feeling it and healing it.
I want a win-win solution. My mind says it doesn’t look like there is one. Now I need to let go and listen at the heart level. I have done a good job of feeling all this but not such a good job of not blaming others for my pain and I know deep down that this is my pain and the same pain of all humanity and this part is mine to feel and heal. My little human self feels very threatened, hence the big reaction and just because I’m beginning to see the bigger picture, doesn’t mean that I just give up or acquiesce what I want instantly. I have done that plenty in the past and it leads to resentment. It’s not about givng in or up, it’s about understanding what is behind such a strong reaction. It’s not about them, it’s about me.
I need to take it home within me otherwise it is just denial. I do want to honor myself and not go invisible when I feel threatened. I know there is a need in me to know and understand something and part of this process is to find out what this is. Then there will be healing. So far there are no quick answers that take away the uncomfortable feeling that I have been disrespected in ways that could affect me a lot.
I know that the solution is not in my mind, that a resolution comes from the formless through the heart. I spend alot of time sitting with myself and breathing, watching my thoughts and feelings.
Claiming my pain, I can see another layer of disrespect I have for myself. See it really is all in me! My human self wants the world outside to change but I truly know that this only follows the inside. I’m the one that doesn’t love herself and there are layers from many lifetimes waiting to manifest and be healed. This lifetime I’m not running away or blaming someone else. Oh those things are so much easier!!
Blessings,
Laurel
Comments:
2008-4-22 Helen
Good for you!!! I can definitely relate. You are certainly something special, Laurel.
Thanks, Mom! I love you!
Russen
WOW!
I recognize you!
You are very brave, Laural. and Thank you.
Jenny
Thank you Helen, Jenny and Russen for your kindness. We are never alone:) Laurel
I want a win-win solution. My mind says it doesn’t look like there is one. Now I need to let go and listen at the heart level. I have done a good job of feeling all this but not such a good job of not blaming others for my pain and I know deep down that this is my pain and the same pain of all humanity and this part is mine to feel and heal. My little human self feels very threatened, hence the big reaction and just because I’m beginning to see the bigger picture, doesn’t mean that I just give up or acquiesce what I want instantly. I have done that plenty in the past and it leads to resentment. It’s not about givng in or up, it’s about understanding what is behind such a strong reaction. It’s not about them, it’s about me.
I need to take it home within me otherwise it is just denial. I do want to honor myself and not go invisible when I feel threatened. I know there is a need in me to know and understand something and part of this process is to find out what this is. Then there will be healing. So far there are no quick answers that take away the uncomfortable feeling that I have been disrespected in ways that could affect me a lot.
I know that the solution is not in my mind, that a resolution comes from the formless through the heart. I spend alot of time sitting with myself and breathing, watching my thoughts and feelings.
Claiming my pain, I can see another layer of disrespect I have for myself. See it really is all in me! My human self wants the world outside to change but I truly know that this only follows the inside. I’m the one that doesn’t love herself and there are layers from many lifetimes waiting to manifest and be healed. This lifetime I’m not running away or blaming someone else. Oh those things are so much easier!!
Blessings,
Laurel
Comments:
2008-4-22 Helen
Good for you!!! I can definitely relate. You are certainly something special, Laurel.
Thanks, Mom! I love you!
Russen
WOW!
I recognize you!
You are very brave, Laural. and Thank you.
Jenny
Thank you Helen, Jenny and Russen for your kindness. We are never alone:) Laurel
Moving Inside-Sunday, March 30, 2008
A few weeks back a good friend of mine, Moe, was in town with the Family Systems Research Group which grew out of the Gentle Wind Project. They make these hand held ‘healing instruments’ that work to strengthen and clear a persons energetic system. I am very grateful for all they have created and amazed at what the next step they offer is. They are now using the I Ching and Uranian astrology to create pathways for growth and clear obstacles to wholeness. They had done some of this work on me about 2 months before my encounter with the Council of Trees and I wonder now if that wasn’t what finally opened me to embrace a more expanded reality.
At this seminar, Moe talked again of the victim, rescuer and perpetrator cycle and how if we think we can help someone else, they become the victim. We act as the rescuer and they are ‘one-down’ and that opens them up to becoming a perpetrator of us or others. It creates a one-up or one-down perspective on life that is very unhealthy and breeds anger and mistrust.
What I began to understand was this as an internal cycle and how it is acted out by the different aspects of myself. The internalized critical parent used to beat me up and then I would feel like a victim and try to fix myself. The fixes were mostly external: food, sex, talk, entertainment, distractions, etc and they didn’t really work. They just appeased the dragon of discontent. Even meditation only shut up the critique for a short time. In not recognizing my wholeness, I was a victim of this life, disconnected from others and angry about it all. I was open to the perpetrators and attracted many wolves in sheep’s clothing. My anger came out in situations with other victims and I became the ‘perp’ also. So the vicious cycle can continue and is evident daily around us.
I wasn’t sure where I was going with this today but it is coming to me that so much of what is offered up right now in a spiritual way suggests that the ego is bad and we need to surrender. This comes out of the eastern traditions where there may be little of this victim, rescuer, perpetrator cycle, where there is a basic respect and acknowledgement of a persons worth. Their culture is different and I question whether what they offer will work easily for most westerners. (Maybe it is even beyond that and has more to do with the fear of the rise of the feminine in the wake of the downfall or re-balancing of the masculine. It’s as if the patriarchy has not worked so in the rise of the feminine, let’s reject the ego, because the feminine principles won’t work either.)
So many of the people I see in my work are stuck in this internal critical cycle and when they approach a spiritual path, I feel they are trying to give up what they don’t have: a strong sense of self, an ego. They try to put the cart before the horse. The goal is not to be humble, it is to be whole and feel humility in amazement of the everything that is.
Trying to be humble is not the same as knowing who you really are and having humility happen to you as an extension of that experience. Humility comes from knowing that you are the master and creator of your life and so is everyone else. You are unique but equal and an intelligence beyond this form. This is not an intellectual understanding, it is an experience that you live. Trying to be humble is a waste of time and energy. Forgiving yourself for the misperceptions you hold of who you are is valid. Taking responsibility for your thoughts, feelings and judgements helps a lot. Opening to your own wholeness and worth extracts you from the victim cycle and heads you in the right direction.
What is surrendered to when you are not experiencing wholeness? Dogma. Just a bunch of ideas like these, not the breathing in and out of a divine being living in a human body on this planet.
Blessings on this holy day,
Laurel
Comments:
Asia Guyer
I loved this insight, mostly the realization of the difference between being humble and having humility. Self worth (ego) is all too often frowned upon while on our spiritual quest, where I feel many people in this hectic day and age need to remind themselves often, how precious their individual life is to all of creation. We in our tiny parts and only all of us together make the whole. Laurel : Thank you, Asia
At this seminar, Moe talked again of the victim, rescuer and perpetrator cycle and how if we think we can help someone else, they become the victim. We act as the rescuer and they are ‘one-down’ and that opens them up to becoming a perpetrator of us or others. It creates a one-up or one-down perspective on life that is very unhealthy and breeds anger and mistrust.
What I began to understand was this as an internal cycle and how it is acted out by the different aspects of myself. The internalized critical parent used to beat me up and then I would feel like a victim and try to fix myself. The fixes were mostly external: food, sex, talk, entertainment, distractions, etc and they didn’t really work. They just appeased the dragon of discontent. Even meditation only shut up the critique for a short time. In not recognizing my wholeness, I was a victim of this life, disconnected from others and angry about it all. I was open to the perpetrators and attracted many wolves in sheep’s clothing. My anger came out in situations with other victims and I became the ‘perp’ also. So the vicious cycle can continue and is evident daily around us.
I wasn’t sure where I was going with this today but it is coming to me that so much of what is offered up right now in a spiritual way suggests that the ego is bad and we need to surrender. This comes out of the eastern traditions where there may be little of this victim, rescuer, perpetrator cycle, where there is a basic respect and acknowledgement of a persons worth. Their culture is different and I question whether what they offer will work easily for most westerners. (Maybe it is even beyond that and has more to do with the fear of the rise of the feminine in the wake of the downfall or re-balancing of the masculine. It’s as if the patriarchy has not worked so in the rise of the feminine, let’s reject the ego, because the feminine principles won’t work either.)
So many of the people I see in my work are stuck in this internal critical cycle and when they approach a spiritual path, I feel they are trying to give up what they don’t have: a strong sense of self, an ego. They try to put the cart before the horse. The goal is not to be humble, it is to be whole and feel humility in amazement of the everything that is.
Trying to be humble is not the same as knowing who you really are and having humility happen to you as an extension of that experience. Humility comes from knowing that you are the master and creator of your life and so is everyone else. You are unique but equal and an intelligence beyond this form. This is not an intellectual understanding, it is an experience that you live. Trying to be humble is a waste of time and energy. Forgiving yourself for the misperceptions you hold of who you are is valid. Taking responsibility for your thoughts, feelings and judgements helps a lot. Opening to your own wholeness and worth extracts you from the victim cycle and heads you in the right direction.
What is surrendered to when you are not experiencing wholeness? Dogma. Just a bunch of ideas like these, not the breathing in and out of a divine being living in a human body on this planet.
Blessings on this holy day,
Laurel
Comments:
Asia Guyer
I loved this insight, mostly the realization of the difference between being humble and having humility. Self worth (ego) is all too often frowned upon while on our spiritual quest, where I feel many people in this hectic day and age need to remind themselves often, how precious their individual life is to all of creation. We in our tiny parts and only all of us together make the whole. Laurel : Thank you, Asia
Loving Self and Loving Others-Sunday, March 2, 2008
We are taught that it is important to love and be kind to others. Yet real love is not a thought or mental exercise so much as it’s a feeling. There is a big difference here. To be authentic it must come from our love of self, overflowing from the cup that is full. Here is the paradox. If we focus on ‘loving’ others, there is no real love to be found. When we focus on loving ourselves, it can feel selfish at first but then our cup begins to be full and our hearts overflow toward others. The recipient of this love knows that it is unconditional and real, knows that their true self is being seen. Our oneness is being acknowledged.
Sometimes the recipient can’t feel it because they don’t love themselves yet. We all want to be loved and the love we need comes from within, breath by breath, heartbeat by heartbeat, from the wellspring of who we really are and the gift of being present with ourselves. It can feel so uncomfortable to focus on one’s self that most of us have to be gently talked into it. It takes a little time and perseverance because the mind says it’s wrong and throws old wounds in our face, saying that’s why we don’t go there. Yet there is the way through. The way around is not working, really. This is the hardest yet most important thing we can ever learn and do. It doesn’t have anything to do with accomplishments, our weight, intelligence or degrees. oday consider the gift of loving yourself by paying attention, being present, appreciating who you really are. Breathe into the present and allow yourself to be okay right now. This is all there is.
Blessings,
Laurel and The Trees
Sometimes the recipient can’t feel it because they don’t love themselves yet. We all want to be loved and the love we need comes from within, breath by breath, heartbeat by heartbeat, from the wellspring of who we really are and the gift of being present with ourselves. It can feel so uncomfortable to focus on one’s self that most of us have to be gently talked into it. It takes a little time and perseverance because the mind says it’s wrong and throws old wounds in our face, saying that’s why we don’t go there. Yet there is the way through. The way around is not working, really. This is the hardest yet most important thing we can ever learn and do. It doesn’t have anything to do with accomplishments, our weight, intelligence or degrees. oday consider the gift of loving yourself by paying attention, being present, appreciating who you really are. Breathe into the present and allow yourself to be okay right now. This is all there is.
Blessings,
Laurel and The Trees
The Mind, Guilt and Shame- Sunday, Febraury 17, 2008
It’s okay to be who and what you are. Do you believe this?
When we were younger we felt if we could just do everything right then all our doubts about ourselves would be untrue. Where does this doubt come from anyway? For some of us, it was passed down from our parents, but many had no such parental inscriptions. I don’t even know how prevalent this is in other cultures but this lack of basic esteem and striving for perfection is rampant here in the US. It is evident in our drinking and addiction rates and even the massive amount of people who have safeguarded themselves in the box of a fundamental religion. We don’t feel good about ourselves and need a way out of this pain.
Many try to use mind control but some of us find this a futile struggle. The constant retraining of thoughts and beliefs is tiring and does it ever end? It seems something is wrong at a core level or something is right at the core level that isn’t being recognized. What if all you understand about who you are is not quite true? If real growth and learning come from what we do NOT know, then we somehow need to open to a new way of seeing ourselves and our world.
The trees say we are the creators and masters of our own lives. I squirmed at this for a long time when I first heard it. It felt way too big and the opposite of everything I’d been taught. How can I have power over my own life when I feel so buffeted by everything around me? How can I control what I feel and think? Won’t I just turn into an obnoxious egotistic brat? Well it really is a step by step process of understanding something new and the tools to implement it. A new way to be with the guilt, shame and disbelief of the mind is taught. The way out of pain (and out of trying to control everything so that you are not in pain) is elucidated step by step. It did not happen overnight for me, even though I had the trees talking in my ears most nights; it took months. I love this because I am not trying to control my thinking, which seemed like an impossible thing to do anyway.
Deep in my being there is a feeling of wholeness and deep joy. There is freedom and gratitude for this deep gift from The Council of Trees. The teachings come at our understanding of who and what we are from other ways besides the intellect. We are much much bigger than what we can grasp in our minds. We love our imperfections, our humanness and our lives. We stop running away from ourselves and embrace our lives and the fullness within.
Blessings,
Laurel
When we were younger we felt if we could just do everything right then all our doubts about ourselves would be untrue. Where does this doubt come from anyway? For some of us, it was passed down from our parents, but many had no such parental inscriptions. I don’t even know how prevalent this is in other cultures but this lack of basic esteem and striving for perfection is rampant here in the US. It is evident in our drinking and addiction rates and even the massive amount of people who have safeguarded themselves in the box of a fundamental religion. We don’t feel good about ourselves and need a way out of this pain.
Many try to use mind control but some of us find this a futile struggle. The constant retraining of thoughts and beliefs is tiring and does it ever end? It seems something is wrong at a core level or something is right at the core level that isn’t being recognized. What if all you understand about who you are is not quite true? If real growth and learning come from what we do NOT know, then we somehow need to open to a new way of seeing ourselves and our world.
The trees say we are the creators and masters of our own lives. I squirmed at this for a long time when I first heard it. It felt way too big and the opposite of everything I’d been taught. How can I have power over my own life when I feel so buffeted by everything around me? How can I control what I feel and think? Won’t I just turn into an obnoxious egotistic brat? Well it really is a step by step process of understanding something new and the tools to implement it. A new way to be with the guilt, shame and disbelief of the mind is taught. The way out of pain (and out of trying to control everything so that you are not in pain) is elucidated step by step. It did not happen overnight for me, even though I had the trees talking in my ears most nights; it took months. I love this because I am not trying to control my thinking, which seemed like an impossible thing to do anyway.
Deep in my being there is a feeling of wholeness and deep joy. There is freedom and gratitude for this deep gift from The Council of Trees. The teachings come at our understanding of who and what we are from other ways besides the intellect. We are much much bigger than what we can grasp in our minds. We love our imperfections, our humanness and our lives. We stop running away from ourselves and embrace our lives and the fullness within.
Blessings,
Laurel
Being Present- Monday, January 21, 2008
Dear Friends,
Today is a good day to spend a little time with yourself. Today is a new beginning, a day like no others. Give yourself this gift of today. Take a few deep breaths and settle into your body. What cozyness is there? Are there any places of tension? Breath into the tension and let it go now. Today is your day so take with you just what you want and let anything else go. ( I drop my shoulders ) Listen carefully to the magic in you, the wondrous workings of your physical body and the subtle feelings that move through it. Wiggle a little, access the little child in you who wiggled alot all day long. Maybe wiggle a lot if it feels good:)
I want to share a story that helped me understand the wealth of depth and memory of what’s in our bodies. Quite a few years ago in a CranioSacral Therapy class for treating children, I had an unusual experience. In order to teach us about the birth process, we were lead back through our own birth. We did this a few times, starting at conception and feeling and moving with the process as it flowed. We were working in groups of two and I had teamed up with a kind gentle man that I felt I could trust to let go deeply. It was instructive to feel so much of what was going on with my parents and feel the whole journey from start to finish.
As I came out the birth canal, the whole room reaked of cigarettes. I kept asking my partner if he smoked and he didn’t at all, never had. Where was the smell coming from? It was coming from me, from my memory, from my cells memory! I knew my Mom smoked during the pregnancy, but this was NOT from my thoughts, this was from me. It took me awhile to really understand that it’s all in us, really it’s ALL in us. Every memory, every smell, taste, touch, sound is planted in you way before your cognitive processes develop and function well. This may be forgotten as we grow into our minds and we start allowing our thoughts to rule what we attune to each day.
So today take back your body, it’s not just something your mind drags around to do what it wants. It’s you, an important part of you and keeper of so many feelings and understandings. It is your master puzzle. Pick up a piece now and take it in, fully allowing yourself to be with it. You can accept it now, you have the maturity and insight to know it doesn’t have to run you anymore. Breathe it in and then let it go. Your life now is what you choose and all the memories can be opened gently so their weight doesn’t hold you back anymore. Now you belong here, now you are free.
Blessings,
Laurel
Today is a good day to spend a little time with yourself. Today is a new beginning, a day like no others. Give yourself this gift of today. Take a few deep breaths and settle into your body. What cozyness is there? Are there any places of tension? Breath into the tension and let it go now. Today is your day so take with you just what you want and let anything else go. ( I drop my shoulders ) Listen carefully to the magic in you, the wondrous workings of your physical body and the subtle feelings that move through it. Wiggle a little, access the little child in you who wiggled alot all day long. Maybe wiggle a lot if it feels good:)
I want to share a story that helped me understand the wealth of depth and memory of what’s in our bodies. Quite a few years ago in a CranioSacral Therapy class for treating children, I had an unusual experience. In order to teach us about the birth process, we were lead back through our own birth. We did this a few times, starting at conception and feeling and moving with the process as it flowed. We were working in groups of two and I had teamed up with a kind gentle man that I felt I could trust to let go deeply. It was instructive to feel so much of what was going on with my parents and feel the whole journey from start to finish.
As I came out the birth canal, the whole room reaked of cigarettes. I kept asking my partner if he smoked and he didn’t at all, never had. Where was the smell coming from? It was coming from me, from my memory, from my cells memory! I knew my Mom smoked during the pregnancy, but this was NOT from my thoughts, this was from me. It took me awhile to really understand that it’s all in us, really it’s ALL in us. Every memory, every smell, taste, touch, sound is planted in you way before your cognitive processes develop and function well. This may be forgotten as we grow into our minds and we start allowing our thoughts to rule what we attune to each day.
So today take back your body, it’s not just something your mind drags around to do what it wants. It’s you, an important part of you and keeper of so many feelings and understandings. It is your master puzzle. Pick up a piece now and take it in, fully allowing yourself to be with it. You can accept it now, you have the maturity and insight to know it doesn’t have to run you anymore. Breathe it in and then let it go. Your life now is what you choose and all the memories can be opened gently so their weight doesn’t hold you back anymore. Now you belong here, now you are free.
Blessings,
Laurel
The Patriarchy- Sunday, January 13, 2008
Have you ever read Deborah Tanner’s “You Just Don’t Understand”? I remember what a profound impact it had on me. The book outlines how males and females in our society are socialized, perceived and supported differently. I realized that my perceptions of the inequality of how male and female children are raised are true and go beyond my own family. I have a great brother who was born 2 years before me. In our family, he could do no wrong and when he did “it was just because he’s all boy”, which meant there was something golden about him and whatever he did.
Despite all the efforts to the contrary, the equality in the way males and females are treated in our society, and often our world, has a long way to go. It feels like this disparity is in the air, so ingrained in our cultures that we don’t even see it except when it’s most glaring and then we shrug our shoulders and feel that that’s just the way things are. Is there some unwritten agreement at a cellular level that has been passed down for eons of time?
There is a rise of the feminine coming, we feel it and it may feel uncomfortable to both men and women. It’s interesting to me that many of the TV shows recently portray men to be such boobs (boy look at the use of this word!) and jerks. Is this self-effacing behavior or a carrot from the dominant paradigm? It’s all so obvious and yet insidious. The big question is: How do we heal it? What really needs to be healed?
What needs to be healed is within us. There is an imbalance of the masculine and feminine is us that is projected out into all we see and feel. This is the only place of true healing because if it’s healed within us then we won’t feel it out in the world either. First, we can hold 100% acceptance that this is our perception (those of us who have it). It’s necessary to feel the inequality within us, in our bodies and feelings. If we deny this then how can we heal it? Next we can forgive ourselves. This doesn’t mean we were responsible for creating it, but that we hold 100% responsibility for it’s truth in us. Forgiving ourselves and our perception, we bless it and let it go. Now we imagine a world of equality of value. There is a premium importance here of not making this just a mental exercise yet staying out of the drama or victim modes. Maybe you can identify a situation in your own life where this was evident and feel how you felt then and now about what happened.
This is a big gift because the imbalance of the masculine and feminine within all of us is deep and historical. Practicing this healing whenever we identify these old feelings of imbalance can begin to ameliorate the depth of this and begin to free us from roles that we never wanted in the first place.
Blessings,
Laurel
Despite all the efforts to the contrary, the equality in the way males and females are treated in our society, and often our world, has a long way to go. It feels like this disparity is in the air, so ingrained in our cultures that we don’t even see it except when it’s most glaring and then we shrug our shoulders and feel that that’s just the way things are. Is there some unwritten agreement at a cellular level that has been passed down for eons of time?
There is a rise of the feminine coming, we feel it and it may feel uncomfortable to both men and women. It’s interesting to me that many of the TV shows recently portray men to be such boobs (boy look at the use of this word!) and jerks. Is this self-effacing behavior or a carrot from the dominant paradigm? It’s all so obvious and yet insidious. The big question is: How do we heal it? What really needs to be healed?
What needs to be healed is within us. There is an imbalance of the masculine and feminine is us that is projected out into all we see and feel. This is the only place of true healing because if it’s healed within us then we won’t feel it out in the world either. First, we can hold 100% acceptance that this is our perception (those of us who have it). It’s necessary to feel the inequality within us, in our bodies and feelings. If we deny this then how can we heal it? Next we can forgive ourselves. This doesn’t mean we were responsible for creating it, but that we hold 100% responsibility for it’s truth in us. Forgiving ourselves and our perception, we bless it and let it go. Now we imagine a world of equality of value. There is a premium importance here of not making this just a mental exercise yet staying out of the drama or victim modes. Maybe you can identify a situation in your own life where this was evident and feel how you felt then and now about what happened.
This is a big gift because the imbalance of the masculine and feminine within all of us is deep and historical. Practicing this healing whenever we identify these old feelings of imbalance can begin to ameliorate the depth of this and begin to free us from roles that we never wanted in the first place.
Blessings,
Laurel
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